I can’t find my anger tired. weak. senseless. reality.

I can’t find my anger. And I have cold feet. Literally cold feet. Because I was wandering around in the kiez with the shitty weather not knowing where to go, not knowing what to do.
It seems that even the weather is mourning.

I don’t know where to go because my home got evicted just a few days ago.
I don’t know what to do because my collective space, bar and infoladen was evicted just a few days ago.
I know I should be angry, wild, furious. Even some hysteria would be great, this word so often used as propaganda against us! I can’t find my anger. Neither energy, nor motivation.
For sure, everything I write now seems to be a bit over-exaggerated. I am not homeless. I dont have to sleep at a shelter or on the street. But still, I feel home-less.